June 18, 2008

Which graduation is right?

We're a few weeks past PHS's 2008 graduation, and I think now I'm ready to talk about what went down.

We sent about four hundred members of the Class of '08 across the stage at Cintas Center and handed each of them a diploma cover - to be filled in after the ceremony. There were a number of black-robed folks up on stage to escort them along - school board members, principals, central office folks, counselors - and the graduates were then ushered on along and down the steps on the far side of the stage.

I took up my usual and awesome vantage point right at the stairs up onto the stage, keeping the timing right, pausing the grads for a moment before they headed up, reminding them to spit out any gum so they'd look right in their picture, congratulating nearly all of them, and generally making small talk to calm the last minute nerves of - especially - the girls who chose to wear the high heels for the first time ever.

Everything was note perfect from the time they gathered at PHS, loaded the busses bound for Cintas, lined up in the small gym, headed to their seats, and stepped toward the stage.

And that's where the heart attacks started...

"The Princeton Way" of graduating is a rather formal affair. The students are arrayed in alternating rows of red and white with the top students, foreign exchangers, and senior a capella folks up front. We get a couple of none-too-thrilling speaches, and the grads head to the stage.

Their names are read, the live video of the ceremony is shown (now with their names below them in the shot) on the scoreboard up in the rafters, they shake a couple of hands, and head onward. Applause is - according to the principal's request prior to the ceremony - to be held until the final graduate's diploma holder is handed out. No one graduate is to be celebrated individually. Family and friends are not to single out any one over the others.

This year, however...

We got students throwing down their mortarboards (never knew why it was called that, huh), whipping their dreadlocks around, stomping across the stage, dancing, shaking, opening their arms to the heavens, and generally doing a lot more celebrating individually than communally, no matter the gentle hands of administrators trying to usher them along. We got parents - honestly no worse than in the few years past - who set off air horns, clapped and cheered, and yelled - some during the initial processional, some as their graduates crossed the stages, some during the speaches.

And then we got principals and teachers talking afterwards about how to fix the problem...how to make sure that doesn't happen again next year.

We'll give 'em community service hours if they demonstrate like that.

We'll make them pick up their diploma a month later if their parents carry on like that.

We'll warn them in advance of their punishment.

We'll make the parents sign a behavior contract are else they don't walk.

We'll limit the number of tickets so they don't just hand out tickets to any fool in our hallways.

And I'm a little bothered by that.

My dad and mom both graduated from high school before I did, and my sister was certainly headed that way when I matriculated from good ol' NAHS. Heck, Dad had even checked off the whole college degree thing - with a bonus masters, too. (Mom's college experiences apparently involved drifiting off each spring so she could play Dylan songs in the sunshine. Not exactly a plan for getting handed a sheepskin.) They didn't scream my name when I shook hands back as part of the class of nine-two.

They didn't even scream or yell when I got my Wabash diploma - and that one really was printed on sheepskin. Admittedly, Mom tried to embarass me a different way, but that's a tale for another day.

Stay on topic, man...

When I was a high school freshman, my dad sat me down - probably at Mom's insistance, I know the man - and asked me what my goals were for the next four years. Did I want to try for valedictorian? Did I want to get straight A's? What did I want to accomplish?

Nope, none of those. I told him I figured I'd do well enough, but straight A's and the #1 ranking weren't important to me. (I finished #5, right behind Lexi Shallers, not that I'm bitter...) I guessed I wanted to make the radio staff so I could be on air (two years, lots of hours on air, thank you very much).

Did I at least want to graduate and head to college, he asked?

Well, yeah. I thought that was assumed...my flip answer.

In my head, not graduating from high school wasn't an option. I was at least going to get that far and was pretty sure I was going to graduate from college, too.

So there was no reason to whoop and holler for me.

But...

And I feel almost condescending in saying this...

Not every one of the students who went through commencement on June 2nd at Cintas knew they were going to graduate.

Not every one of them could have been so casual with saying that they were going to get a high school diploma.

Not every one of their parents had one, not every one of their siblings had one.

Getting that diploma is a big deal for some of them, something to be celebrated for the years of hard work and struggle, for the acknowledgement by the massive institution of PHS that they accomplished something.

And I'm kind of thinking that they deserve a chance to celebrate, a moment to bask in their glory.

Sure, there's a part of me that wonders just how ready they are for the real world, how good a job we've done in preparing them - particularly some of our graduates who just scraped through with low graduation test scores, low grades, and just few enough discipline issues to make it onto that stage...

But how can we congratulate them but ask them not to celebrate?

How can we please the half (probably more, maybe 2/3rd) of the crowd who still wants that calm, dignified ceremony while still allowing the students to celebrate their moment?

Maybe we need to have a mock ceremony in which we show them what is and what isn't appropriate...but who's to make that decision, draw that line?

Is it okay for a kid to wave to the crowd?

To whoop once?

To cry?

To blow a kiss toward her family?

To blow a kiss toward heaven?

To stomp once?

Twice?

Add in a holler of yes?

I have no idea...I know it wasn't what I was going to do, but that doesn't mean much, and lord knows I'm far from the final arbiter.

And just when have things gotten so far out of hand that the principal really does step forward and do as he and his predecessers have threatened and shut down a graduation? Is it worth killing the ceremony for four hundred graduates and a few thousand friends and family just because a dozen people aren't behaving the way we want them to - not the right way, I won't go that far?

What if it's thirty people whooping and hollering?

What if every fifth graduate moonwalks across the stage?

Every other?

And would that be wrong if they did?



I don't, by the way, honestly have any clue how to solve this or even if it needs solving.

Your opinions are, as always, welcome.

8 comments:

joey said...

its striking how the graduation is always such a circus, but baccalaureate is well behaved, dignified, and honestly probably better in the "reflection" department.

i know this is simply impossible given the number of people graduating in p-towns classes now, but taking it out of a place meant to AMPLIFY noise (i.e. a sports arena) would probably help in the incessant background chatter noise. maybe having it out on the football field would be feasible, who knows.

taking from the baccalaureate idea, why not (other than for the obvious reason) throw it in a church? at least thatll take some of the screamers and keep them quiet (albiet through a little pavlov-ian mind trick)

_______________________

lets be honest though, you touched on it kinda, a lot of it has to do with the huge diversity of p-town. half of the people are like your family, HS graduation was no biggie; for the other half it might as well be the second coming. one side is going to be angry

ame said...

I heard an interesting story on this same point a few days ago when chatting with some other teacher friends. At another school (no idea the name) anyone who yelled was taken out in handcuffs. Apparently they had problems in the past and put into place a zero tolerance policy.

I do remember that when I graduated from NAHS it was considered a big deal we were allowed to throw caps in the air. Of course now they are throwing tradition away totally and all graduating in black gowns. Nope, I'm not bitter about that at all.

Katydid said...

Ah how fun graduation was. My favorite part was the complete lack of a recessional.

My dad's suggestion to fix graduation was to do two: one for people who want tradition and formality, another for those who want to go nuts. It would be up to the students and their parents which to attend. But then that diminishes the idea of graduating as a single class.

I understand that graduating high school is a big deal for a lot of people. A few friends and myself all have families where graduation isn't a given and so it is a big occasion. But there is no need for the absolute hysterics.

achilles3 said...

I saw 4 P-Funk graduations. And just like EVERY single day at PHS, you get a little bit of everything.Which is why I loved all of them.

What I think is funny about education is how the "stage people" think they matter. They don't. Principal. Admin. School Board. None of them.

Parents and students don't give two craps about them. I would argue that having a stage full of people that no one really knows or cares about gives people reason enough to either zone out completely or act a fool.

If I were a parent who made noise or planned on making noise, and I read/heard that some stuffy mostly white adults that take themselves way too seriously wanted to try to "fix" my behavior I would love to slap them around a bit.

At the end of the day you can no more stop these impromptu celebrations than make school boards realize that they don't really belong on stage looking important.

PHS needs to stop living in denial. They are not Mason. They will never be Mason. They are Princeton. Have some pride and embrace these minor "disruptions" and quit wasting taxpayer dollars on offensive conversations based on keeping their already sickening control measures (hall sweep everybody!) in place all way through graduation.

Is the problem that we want to keep everyone in line and we can't? Oh what a scary thought out there in the real world.

As Dave Matthews said
"If you don't get in line we'll lock you away."

TL said...

I've heard how rowdy the audience can get but I think the only rule I would want to put into place is no airhorns. Those can be painful to hear up close!
I love this post. I was unable to make graduation this year, though I really wanted to. This was the first year I could say I taught some of the senior students. It's a sad truth that it's not a given for a huge number of the kids I see. I can think of one who "transferred" to a different school district. He called me a few months ago to tell me he's been working for some time and is ashamed that he still can't read. I can think of another who ran away and ran away until no one could ever find her again. Another who is in jail. Another who dropped out. Yet another who dropped out and trying to look after a miserable family. My list goes on. And that's just from the small number of kids I taught my first year with Princeton over at the junior high.
They're not just cheering for one ceremony, they're cheering in the hope that all the suffering they faced or witnessed won't be inflicted on their own kids.
It's just nice when the racket people make is in joy and not anger!
(forgive any typos, I'm in a hurry to get my thoughts out before my daughter wakes up from her nap!)

joey said...

im glad im not the only long comment this time. Really though, the more I have thought about it, the more I want to know why it wouldn't be possible to just do it on the football field. You could bring in a nice speaker system to just BLARE the people talking so the chatter wasn't an issue (no echo would make a huge difference), and it would be a lot easier to get in and out.

I refuse to believe that "chairs being on the field" is an issue, as I have been told in the past. Maybe it just makes too much sense....

cmorin said...

I think I side with achilles on this one... thats P-Town, going out any other way would be out of character. And the baccalaureate ceremony was not well attended for my class at all. If people want a dignified ceremony, take advantage of the resources!

Also, after going to OSU's graduation at the stadium, I can say outdoor ceremonies are no fun. It was hot and humid and I hated every moment of it. Also, the craziness that is Ohio weather might lead us elsewhere.

But referencing achilles' statement, does anyone think hall sweeps make our school seem like a prison? I mean the warden comes on the PA system, tells everyone to get in their cell, the slamming of the doors can be heard all the way down the hall, the guards walk their assigned routes, and if you aren't where you are supposed to be, you spend time in the pit.

PHSChemGuy said...

At least one of my absent posts got something rolling...

Ok, let's take a thoughtful look...

Joey - the problem with the football field idea is the likelhood of rain during the late spring season makes that pretty well a longshot...as a non-religious guy, the baccalaureate is a non-entity for me...but I like leaning on that as the dignified time rather than making graduation be staid and boring...the acoustics of Cintas are awful, but changing that wouldn't - I don't think - change the on-stage behavior which is the real issue...

Ame - seriously, handcuffs?...I'd be really curious to hear where that was...if you can hunt that down, please send that my way...did we not graduate in black gowns?...in all honesty, it meant so little to me that I don't remember the gown color in the least...Wabash's ceremony has stuck with me, but that may say something about my position on this issue...

Katydid - the ending was a complete charlie foxtrot...and I think that might be spurring the discussion among admin as much as anything...I'm hoping to contribute something to the discussion this coming year and maybe bring some of these opinions to the table...the splitting of graduation into two ceremonies would be tough and would have even fewer staff in attendance...and then there's the cost of renting the hall twice...because you can't put either one in a different hall because one group would be offended that they got the "worse" place...or worse date...or something...

Lakes - agreed about the stage folks not mattering at all...it's always been a bugaboo of mine that I won't wear a black gown and walk in leading the graduates...somehow it makes me feel like I'm the show when I'm most assuredly not...Calen feels differently, that she's willing to wear the black to show respect for the graduates...but clearly the stage folks are - I think - sitting there are the show in their minds, and that bugs me, too...

TL - that's an interesting comment - that the parents aren't cheering the ceremony but rather that someone else won't have to suffer as they did...I might modify it slightly to say that many of the parents believe that they child has succeeded inspite of the offenses and slights and roadblocks that they feel the schools (and sadly the teachers) have put in their way...many of the families who are cheering are the ones who are already so dead set against the school in every choice me make that trying to stifle them might only create more and more hard feelings...

Craig - the hall sweeps are an administration's response to a staff that isn't unified (on this or on any other issue, honestly) in enforcing the rules...it takes a whole lot of work to get the staff together in agreeing with, understanding, and enforcing the rules as a unified whole, and we rarely take that time...because of that, each of us enforces the rules a little differently, which means that the others who enforce that rule more stringently have a tough time doing it...the hallsweeps aren't prisonlike, they're trying to deal with a symptom instead of the root cause...