December 29, 2008

Guard your children well, TL

The Girl is a huge fan of Hello Kitty, but after checking out Christians AGAINST Cartoons!'s website (emphasis theirs) diatribe against the cute little stand-in for Anubis, I may have to do a bit of an exorcism on her tchotchkes...
Susanna, a concerned Christian, recently wrote into Christians Against Cartoons with the following question:

Hi there - maybe you can help me. My Christian neighbor says that Hello Kitty isn't good for her daughter's spirit. I've searched the Internet to find out why. Can you tell me why or post on your site? Thank you.

Well Susanna, I would really like to thank you for asking this for allowing your child to accumulate a menagerie of Hello Kitty dolls is akin to when the Hebrews, after having just been led out of their bondage in Egypt by Moses, decided to mimic their former Egyptian slave masters and worship a calf cast from purest gold! As it says in Deuteronomy 9:16: “And I looked, and behold, you had sinned against the Lord your God--had made for yourselves a molded calf! You had turned aside quickly from the way which the Lord had commanded you.”

It is by no mere coincidence that Hello Kitty herself resembles the cat-headed Sekhmet, the Egyptian sun goddess of destruction! There are also strong resemblances between Hello Kitty and the Lower Nile love goddess Bast. Often cats and cat idols were entombed in the burial chambers of the Pharaohs for the cat had a deep mystical significance to these pagan slave drivers.

Permitting your child to lie in a bed covered in Hello Kitty dolls, you are allowing her to lie in a mock Egyptian burial chamber! This seemingly harmless fascination with these dolls can lead your child down the path of the occult. The so-called “goth” teens who paint their faces to resemble corpses and worship death are also often seen with Hello Kitty memorabilia and stickers incongruously affixed to their usually black attire. This is because these poor, misguided youngsters who have given their eternal souls over to the darkness, know the masked meaning of these cuddly idols. The Hello Kitty, the ChocoCat, The Badtz Maru are just sugar coated stand-ins for Sekhmet, the Anubis and Ra. These are the same gods that The Lord cast down into the sulfur pit of hell and made into demons! Their power, which allowed Ramses to turn his staff into a serpent, cannot be underestimated today.
Oh, but wait...there's more...

For example, I doubt that you knew that...
Burger King Nickelodeon and Sponge Bob are nothing more than three heads of the seven headed beast that the Whore of Babylon rides upon during the End Times!

8 comments:

achilles3 said...

I wonder if there is something that I believe in that is as messed up as this stuff???
wow

TL said...

And I just thought Bratz dolls were a danger to my daughters...

But I thought everyone knew that about Burger King, Nick, and Spongebob. Common knowledge down our way.

Frankly, my daughters could choose to worship Ra himself and I wouldn't care as long as they did their homework and ate their veggies.

PHSChemGuy said...

Oh, I'm sure there's something in your head that's every bit as messed up as this, Lakes.

TL...the Bratz dolls are whores. Ask Calen.

I've never had a problem with Ra, myself. Always seemed like a sunny dispositioned guy.

Mr. Echt said...

Not only are the Bratz dolls whores, they might be pulled off the market after this year because of infringement upon Mattel's rights. Is this a serious website though? Will it tell me why Dora the Explorer corrupts the souls of the innocent?

Emily Gallacher said...

Hahahaha. Holy crap.

Kanjisaurus said...

It's so hard to tell whether or not the site is serious. It kind of reminds me of the mr. current videos on youtube.
p.s. it's funny for a religious website to condemn a show for teaching kids that it's okay to believe in imaginary friends

PHSChemGuy said...

Echt - I heard about the lawsuit. I can't believe the Bratz designer thought he could win that one.over Mattel. As far as I can tell, yes, it's a serious website. Weird but serious.

PHSChemGuy said...

Kanj - belief in the imaginary is what religion hates...they're all about belief in...um...the real but utterly invisible, untouchable, unknowable...

totally different...